Tag: chicken

  • The Big Chook, Moonbi, NSW

    The Big Chook, Moonbi, New South Wales

    Some say she lays golden eggs during the full moon, and that her wattles can be seen from space. All we know is she’s called The Big Chook, and she lives atop an decadent pole in the middle of Moonbi.

    I’m your host, the inimitable Jeremy Cluckson – and you’d have to be a blithering idiot not to take a grand tour out to see this Biggie – bagawk!

    The Big Chook was built from fiberglass in the 1970s, as a tribute to the area’s chicken industry, which was going gangbusters at the time. She sits happily in the centre of town, presiding over Moonbi’s 300-odd residents.

    I guess you could say there’s nothing ‘poultry’ about her. Yes, sometimes my linguistic genius is almost frightening. I could even be a comedi-hen!

    With her stoic expression, sensual curves and elegant – almost provocative – comb, The Chook is marvellous, and every bit as beautiful as a freshly-polished Ferrari 458 Spider.

    It’s not uncommon to find a clutch of chickie-babes strutting around at her base, posing for photos as they travel around the Land of the Bigs.

    Visit The Big Chook and you’ll certainly have something to crow about – bagawk!

    Are you lookin’ for a chookin’?

    A journey to The Big Chook is too much for one chicken-man to handle, so I enlisted the help of my offsider James May-an-Egg (who looks suspiciously like Bigella in a cheap fried egg costume from Spotlight).

    “Oh, cock!” James clucked as she clambered out of my Lamborghini Aventador, which I’d picked up on a whim to celebrate the financial success of Land of the Bigs.
    “The correct terminology is ‘Gallus gallus domesticus’,” I corrected her smarmily. “And I don’t appreciate the blue language – bagawk!”

    “The Big Chook radiates with a regal elegance that belies her rural roots,” James continued. “She’s a little rough around the edges, yet sits majestically above Moonbi, like a queen presiding over her minions.”
    “Yes, The Big Chook and moi have a lot in common,” I chirped. “She’s rustic, complex and alluring – and so am I.”
    “You’re an utter pillock!”

    “Listen,” I bok-bok-bokked. “I brought you out here in a beautiful Lamborghini Aventador –”
    “It’s a Kia Picanto with a few bits of cardboard taped to it!” James sighed. “People have been pointing and laughing. Let’s go.”

    A moment of awkward silence passed between us, and I sensed James was weary of my shenanigans.

    “I know!” I bawked. “Let’s attach wheels and a V8 engine to The Big Chook and drive her across the country. Cock-a-doodle-do you think that’s a good idea?”

    As James strangled the life out of me, I was overcome by shock. I never thought she’d resort to fowl play!

    Made you look, ya dirty chook!

    The Big Chook may rule the roost in Moonbi, but there are many other beautiful Biggies in the area. The Big Golden Guitar is de rigueur in Tamworth, and The Big Fish is winning hearts up the road in Manilla.

    No, not the mega-city in The Philippines – I’m not welcome there after crashing a Porsche 928 into the Minor Basilica of San Sebastian – I mean the agrarian haven by the banks of the River Namoi. Bagawk!

    You’ll also find eggs-actly what you’re looking for in the rustic village of Warral. There lies the incomparable Egg Sheeran. Oh no, I’m not talking about the ginger-nutted global megastar, it’s just a large concrete egg by the side of the road.

    Of course, there are many other big cocks around the place. There’s Charlie the Chicken in Charlestown, Chickaletta in Myrtlebank, and another Big Chook to take a sticky beak at in Mount Vernon.

    Yes, if you love Big Things, it’s your clucky day!

    BAGAWK!

  • Mike the Headless Chicken, Fruita, CO

    Mike the Headless Chicken, Fruita, Colorado, United States of America

    Have you been running round like a headless chicken in search of roadside attractions? Then strut over to Fruita, Colorado, where you’ll find a bonkers statue dedicated to Mike the Headless Chicken!

    The bizarre story of a chook who lived for 18 months after having his noggin lopped off – and went on to become a national celebrity – has long enthralled locals and visitors alike. A four-foot effigy to Mike, lovingly created by local artist Lyle Nichols, can be found outside the Aspen Street Coffee Co on the town’s leafy main street.

    There’s no need to walk around on eggshells when visiting, because the mother hens at the cafe are really quite lovely. Maybe give the omelettes a miss, though – you might offend Mike.

    The headless heartthrob’s no spring chicken, having been revealed to a bemused gathering of admirers back in March of 2000. Carefully crafted from 300 pounds of old metal farm castoffs, including axe heads and sickle blades, Mike fits in with the many oddball artworks scattered around this quirky village.

    “I made him proud-looking and cocky,” Lyle cock-a-doodle-dooed, before joking that he gave the Fruita chamber of commerce a discount because Mike didn’t have a head.

    Despite living just up the road from another Big, the legendary Grrrreta the Grrrreat Big Dinosaur, Mike certainly rules the roost in Fruita. The locals even throw a festival – or should that be nest-ival? – in his honour every June. With a 5km fun run, chicken dancing competition and displays from the region’s craft breweries, there’s always a few sore heads the next morning.

    But I guess that’s better than having no head at all!

    Where’s Your Head At?

    The legend of Mike the Headless Chicken goes back to September 10, 1945. Fruita chap Lloyd Olsen, long henpecked by his domineering mother-in-law, decided to win her over with a succulent chicken dinner. Taking his prized cock, Mike, into the backyard, Lloyd kissed him goodbye and then lopped off his head with an axe.

    And that’s when things got interesting. Instead of laying down to be served with a side of steamed vegetables, Mike went about his day, strutting around and fluffing up his feathers. Lloyd, who couldn’t believe his cluck, fed the decapitated bird with an eye-dropper. It was then that he saw signing signs.

    Leaving his mother-in-law was unfed, Lloyd scooped up his headless chicken and rushed off to the University of Utah. There, the resident boffins proclaimed that Mike had just enough of a brain stem left to go on as if nothing had happened.

    Well, it’s not as though fully-intact chickens are solving the secrets of the universe, anyway.

    Lloyd hired a manager for Mike, and the bonceless bird immediately beaked the curiosity of the public. Soon he was travelling across America and appearing on the front cover of everything from Life magazine to Bird Fanciers Quarterly. Thousands – if not millions – lost their minds when they chooked him out.

    Mike was the cock of the walk. Tabloids of the day caught him partying with Hollywood bad boy Gregory Peck, and stepping out with actresses Ingrid Birdman and Vivi-hen Leigh. The biggest star since Cluck Gable, many thought him destined. But one should never count one’s chickens – headless or otherwise – before they hatch.

    One windswept night in Arizona, after a year-and-a-half without a head, Mike choked to death on a kernel of corn.

    Beakle-Mania was over. Lloyd’s mother-in-law finally received her chicken feast.

    Mike was immortalised in The Guinness Book of Records (as the longest surviving headless chicken), and the docu-hen-tary Chick Flick: The Miracle Mike Story. Pop royalty penned ballads about him. Mike the Headless Chicken by Sandy Lind lit up the charts, as did Headless Mike by The Radioactive Chicken Heads (An instant celebrity/He toured the country in an auto/Probably the greatest thing/To ever come from Colorado).

    Mike brought newfound respect to chickens worldwide. He inspired other Bigs such as California’s Chicken Boy, and Charlie, Chickeletta and The Big Chook over in Australia.

    Quite a chicken-feat, but nothing serves as a greater tribute to his legacy than the BIG statue in his hometown of Fruita. Cheeky, handsome and truly individual, you’ll have egg on face if you don’t see it!