Tag: Hunter Valley

  • The Crowtrap Crow, Pokolbin, NSW

    The Crowtrap Crow, Pokolbin, New South Wales, Australia

    Stone the crows! This black beauty can be found at the entrance to Crowtrap Studio in Pokolbin, and was created by revered local artist Chris Fussell.

    Playful and cheeky with a menacing edge, The Crowtrap Crow is one of the most realistic Biggies I’ve ever encountered. Individually-sculpted feathers have worn and aged over the past two decades, giving him more character with every passing year.

    The Crow is perched as though ready to take flight – a moment of action frozen in time. But what truly lingers on the mind are his wise, knowing eyes. Seeming to peer through time, they exude wisdom and compassion.

    Resting by the side of the dusty, peaceful, Palmers Lane, The Crow’s very easy to take a photo with. Accompanied by an orchestra of native birds, you’ll have plenty of time to take a selfie with this obsidian avian, far from the maddening crowds.

    One thing’s for sure – The Crowtrap Crow is no tourist trap!

    Something to Crow About

    The Crow serves as a quirky mascot for the Crowtrap art studio, and offers insight into the marvellous mind of Chris Fussell.

    “I like to try and capture the childlike joy of creating, whether it is painting or sculpture,” cawed Chris, who also crafted The Big Kookaburra in nearby Kurri Kurri. “Pushing the medium to the limits of control. It becomes a relationship between subject, medium and self, always fluctuating.”

    Chris has already left an indelible mark on the Land of the Bigs, but now he’s really spreading his wings. In April 2025, after two years of painstaking work, he put the finishing touches on a second Big Kookaburra.

    Similar – though by no means identical – to the one in Kurri, this king-sized kingfisher was plonked on the back of a flatbed truck and trundled all the way down to Donald, Victoria. He now stand proudly outside Kooka’s Country Cookies.

    I didn’t think I could like Chris and his work any more than I already did – but I was made to eat crow on that one!

    Counting Crows

    Everybody’s heard about the bird, but I’m not sure feather you know there are so many other winged wonders spread across the Land of the Bigs.

    The Big Bowerbird is about 400km away, as the crow flies, in Raleigh. New South Wales is also home to Canoli the Cocky, Stanley the Emu, and the roguish Cowra Eagle.

    Take a short flight up to Queensland to admire local celebs Pelican Pete and Katey Seagull. Apple Tree Creek is home to The Big Parrot, while The Big Honeyeater lives in Logan Reserve. He’s really sweet!

    Chick-toria – oops, I mean Victoria! – has some beaky pals, too. The rather pleasant Bruno the Pheasant has lured in Bigthusiasts for decades, whilst The Big Eagle is a newer addition. Then there’s The Big Kingfisher and a few Big Emus in Strathfieldsaye. They’re flappin’ fabulous!

    Adelaide has a Big Pigeon strutting around Rundle Mall. Loxton has a dashing Pelican. Canberra – that most romantic of cities – has some Kissing Galahs. Even Dar-wing – oops, I mean Darwin! – has Chinute Chinute the Big Owl.

    And then there’s the big chickens! From The Big Chook in Moonbi to Charlie the Chicken, and Chickeletta to The Big Chook in Mount Vernon, these guys are all they’re clucked up to be!

    Oh, and who could forget The Big Penguin? He live in (where else) Penguin, Tasmania!

    “I wish there were more Big Crows around the place for this to guy hang out with,” I moaned to Gordon as we drove off.
    “It’s probably for the best,” he chuckled. “That would be attempted murder!”

  • The Big Pencil, Newcastle, NSW

    The Big Pencil, Newcastle, New South Wales

    2B or not 2B, that is the question. And the answer, of course, is not 2B, as the perky Pencil is clearly an HB, the most princely on the graphite grading scale.

    Positioned beneath the jaw-droppingly beautiful Nobbys Lighthouse along Newcastle’s eastern beaches, he doubles as a seat from which to enjoy this glorious part of the world. Despite what you may think, the area’s not sketchy at all!

    And don’t worry, this scribbly sensation won’t be going anywhere, because he’s stationary. Now that’s worth writing home about!

    I’ve been lead to believe the Big Headphones and Ossie the Mossie are nearby, but what about a Big Sharpener? I’d hate for this crazy crayon to get blunt!

    Time to pencil in a visit to Newie, Big Thing lovers!

  • Wo-Man, Garland Valley, NSW

    Wo-Man, Garland Valley, New South Wales

    As a passionate supporter of the LGBTQI+ community, it’s my pleasure to introduce Australia’s very first transgender Big – the voluptuous Wo-Man! Xe is loud and proud and shimmers like a disco ball, bedazzling all who venture into the backwoods of Wollombi.

    This remote location is a surprising home for such a progressive Big, who’s happy to show off xis ample bosom and metallic member for anyone to see. Xe has legs for days and is the true monarch of the forest, so if you think I sound jealous, I am!

    An abandoned service station, rotting furniture and desolate fields make for a lonely yet unique home for Wo-Man, and there’s even a rusting yacht on site, despite being hours from the coast. It’s like a scene from a bloodthirsty horror movie, with Wo-Man playing the part of the buxom beauty!

    Beauty and the Beast


    There’s trouble in paradise, however, and I must issue a serious warning to those planning to visit Wo-Man, as xis owner is a real oddball and not particularly welcoming of those who stop for a photo. In an unprovoked and hyper-aggressive display of male fragility, I was verbally and emotionally abused by the heavily-bearded tough guy as he grilled some sausages, leaving a group of disgusted customers gaping in disbelief. As the vicious words crashed down upon me, I sensed Wo-Man shuddering.

    I would’ve thought someone who built a four-metre-tall trans friend to keep himself company in remote bushland would be more open-minded. Then again, if I owned a Big Thing – especially one as alluring as Wo-Man – I’d probably be a tad possessive, too!

    My suggestion is to pull up, say a quick hello to Wo-Man as you snap a selfie, then drive off before the hate speech starts flying. Hopefully this gentleman’s sausage sizzling skills are better than his social abilities, because he certainly left a sour taste in my mouth!

    My heart weeps to think of Wo-Man being trapped in such a toxic environment, but it’s not my place to get involved. Not just because xe is big enough to fend for xirself, but because xe simply wouldn’t fit on the back of my scooter. Hopefully one day xe’ll meet someone who treats xem the way xe deserves – maybe the hardworking Big Gold Panner, the brave Big Knight, the bashful Coota Giant, or even Matilda. Until then shine on, you crazy diamond!

  • The Big Wine Bottle, Pokolbin, NSW

    The Big Wine Bottle, Pokolbin, New South Wales

    Wine me, dine me, 21-foot-nine me! No visit to New South Wales’ Wine Country is complete without sharing a cheeky glass of red with this vine fellow, who’s been baffling drunkards since 1998.

    The Big Wine Bottle takes pride of place at the sprawling Hunter Valley Gardens, which offers an array of restaurants and gift shops against a backdrop of rolling fields. A visit is a grape opportunity to eat your body weight in cheese and have a blood alcohol level higher than your age by 11am.

    The Bottle’s bulbous bottom has space for an open fire – perfect for those chilly winter nights – with the neck forming a charming chimney. He’s located in the shade of a pleasant tree and, like the similarly-sized Big Bundy Rum Bottle, it’s no cham-pain to grab a photo, so wine not see him today?

    If you’re on a winery tour of Big Things, pop over to Rutherglen to drink in the delights of their 36-metre-tall bottle! Oh, and you’ll need a Big Corkscrew, which you can find in Berrima!

    I visited the Pokolbin Wine Bottle during a chum’s Hen’s Night, and unfortunately overindulged on Tyrrell’s Pinot noir and chocolate macarons. I ended up bursting into tears and wailing about how I’ll never find a giant roadside attraction who’ll love me for me, and a sémillon other silly things. Thankfully, when I woke up the next morning, the world looked a little more rosé.

    I told that joke to the Big Wine Bottle, but he just gave me a sauvignon blanc stare.

  • Ossie the Mossie, Hexham, NSW

    Put the Mortein away, he’s friendly! Ossie the Mossie watches vigilantly over the much-loved Hexham Bowling Club, and after giving him a good insect-ion I’m pleased to report that he certainly doesn’t suck!

    Hexham Grey mosquitos have long been the bowlo’s symbol, so in 1994 members cobbled together $17,200 to build a personable pest of epic proportions. Basing his design on an oversized chicken displayed at a nearby car dealership, he was introduced by Lord Mayor John McNaughton to unprecedented scenes of jubilation. Of course some of the local bar-flys found Ossie to be quite buzz-arre, but ultimately warmed to him.

    Like me, this super-detailed Big Thing is a real social butterfly! His legion of admirers certainly enjoyed honking their horns as they drove past during our photo shoot. We were like two peas in a pod but, whilst I’m a natural beauty, Ossie has had some work done to retain his youthful complexion.

    Handsome from his head to his mosqui-toes

    “Ossie had some plastic surgery in 2004 and 2008 because of damage from the elements and other insects,” former Secretary Manager Jon Chin told an enraptured reporter from The Hunter Headline.

    “He had another ‘nip and tuck’ in 2010 when the Roads and Maritime Service ordered Ossie be moved back four metres to assist with the widening of the Pacific Highway. That time he received some animation including glowing green eyes, a new red belly, and a neon nose.”

    After gawping in open-jawed wonder at Ossie and taking a few (hundred!) photos with him, make sure you pop into the club. Not only are the staff delightful, but the Riverside Bistro offers a banquet menu that’s to die for. Don’t pass away, however, because the Big Kookaburra and the Big Ugg Boots are tantalisingly close and well worth visiting. Or perhaps you feel drawn towards the Big Pencil?

    Alright, alright, I’ll stop bugging you now – bye!

    A quick note: Unfortunately this post has received a number of disturbing comments referencing (forgive my language here) Ossie’s ‘big prick’, or variations thereof. Seriously guys, act your age and not your shoe size. Such ‘humour’ will not be glamorised on this website.