Tag: The Big Guitar

  • Ready to Play, St George, Utah

    Ready to Play, St George, Utah, United States of America

    I wanna rock ‘n’ roll all night, and visit St George every day! That’s because this leafy Utah town is home to a big, bad and bombastic scrap metal guitar known as Ready to Play. Melding small-town sensibilities with snarling city swagger, the incredible instrument has really struck a chord with the locals.

    At 21 feet from titanic tuners to behemoth bridge, this Big Guitar dominates St George’s well-maintained Town Square Park. You can find it right next to the library, but don’t fret, the librarians won’t come out and shush you, which should come as music to your ears.

    Ready to Play was composed by the rock god of Big Things himself, Deveren Farley. A local legend responsible for many heavy metal artworks such as the nearby Giant Spider, Dev really turned it up to eleven with this one.

    “As an artist, I strive to take what others imagine and bring it to life for them by creating a piece that is as unique and beautiful as the idea itself,” Deveren harmonised.

    People strumming and going from the park can’t help but stare in wonder at the six-string’s kooky details. Just look at that repurposed hacksaw. Oh, oh, oh, and there’s even a regular-sized guitar in there! Sorry if I’m amped up, but it’s riff-possible not to get excited about a work of guit-art this large.

    Much like Ready to Play, I’m quite highly strung – awwww yeah!

    God gave St George Utah to you
    Gave St George Utah to you
    Put it in the soul of everyone!

    St George is the spiritual home of American rock ‘n’ roll, and thousands of audiophiles have made the pilgrimage to worship at the base of Ready to Play. It’s a fully-functional guitar with working strings, so I plucked up the courage to shred some chords.

    Channelling my heavy metal heroes like Boy George and Gary Glitter, I strummed away like my life depended on it – and, in a way, it did. Sweat poured down my brow and then, amidst the chaos, I saw a lithe, blonde figure moving towards me. A legendary guitarist with the voice of an angel had heard my siren call.

    “OMG, it’s you,” I gasped. “Utah’s very own Jewel!”
    “Yes, it’s me,” the vixen cooed, flipping her strawberry blonde hair our of her eyes. “Utah’s very own Jewel!”

    “Golly gosh, I listened to Pieces Of You on repeat whilst struggling with my identity as a youth. And even though your latter albums are widely regarded as derivative and bland, I tolerate them, too.” I paused, tears welling in my eyes. “Jewel Kilcher, I love you!”

    The waif looked at me as if I’d stepped in something unpleasant.

    “Uh, I’m Jewel Sanchez from the library,” she shrugged. “Your car’s getting towed.”

    “Oh well,” I thought as I swaggered out of town towards the impound lot. “I always considered myself more of an urban hip-hop visionary, anyway.”

    Let’s Get the Band Back Together!

    Has Ready to Play awakened a carnal yearning for music that can only be satiated by visiting other big musical instruments? You’re in luck, because the Land of the Bigs is home to rhythmic roadside attractions to suit all tastes.

    Moody, depressed admirers of grunge music can stare impassively at the mercurial Sonic Bloom in Seattle. For something with a little Latin flava, boogie across the border to Mexico City, where I’m sure you’ll find Monkey with Banjo to be Chimp-ly Irresistible!

    More of a hillbilly cowpunk fan? Then the melodic village of Kin Kin in Queensland, Australia is home to a bulky set of banjos with expertly-tuned metal strings just begging to be plucked.

    If your woman done left you and your dog done died, the country music mecca of Tamworth, Australia is home to the immense Big Golden Guitar. Continue south, into the heart of bumpkin country, to play a few licks on The Big Playable Guitar in Narrandera. Yeeee-haw!

    And if your significant other keeps complaining about all the noise – I’m looking at you, Gordon! – waltz over to Newcastle to find some huge headphones to plonk atop your handsome head. You can even attach a Bluetooth speaker, so you can blast your music just as loud as you want.

    Oh, and would you like a VIP experience with a massive rock star? Then you’ll dig Utah’s very own Big John the Big Miner.

    Hopefully that list hit all the right notes – teehee!

  • The Big Playable Guitar, Narrandera, NSW

    The Big Playable Guitar, Narrandera, New South Wales

    For more than a decade, the far-flung village of Narrandera was the centre of the Big Thing universe. As home to the World’s Largest Playable Guitar – a 5.82m-long acoustic axe that fascinated music lovers and Thing-o-philes alike – the region’s economy boomed. Then the unthinkable happened, and it all came crashing down. This is the story of how the music almost died.

    Looking to promote the Country Music Club of Narrandera, local guitar guru Robert Palmer (who may or may not be the Simply Irresistible dude) spent more than 300 hours carefully crafting the bodacious banjo, before presenting it to the public in 1988. Headbangers, country bumpkins and wannabe rock gods put aside their differences as they teamed up to play the fully-functional fiddle, which is so big it requires a small team of musicians to play it.

    When the Guitar was listed in the 1991 edition of the Guinness Book of Records, the town’s pubs were drunk dry in celebration. Tourism reached record highs and every road led to Narrandera. There was even talk of building an international airport with direct flights from Shanghai and Wagga Wagga to cope with the sightseers. The owners of the other Big Guitar could only look on with envious eyes. 

    But, as pop legend Bob Dylan once warbled, “The times, they are a-changin’”, and darkness descended upon Narrandera in 2000. And I’m not talking about Y2K, although many locals did unplug their toasters as a preventative measure against them gaining sentience and chasing them around the kitchen.

    Don’t mess with Texas

    Proving that everything is indeed bigger in Texas, a bunch of rowdy students from the Academy of Science and Technology in Conroe built an immense, 13.3-metre-long playable guitar and cruelly snatched the record. Conroe got the tourists. Conroe got the fame. Sadly, Conroe even got the international airport with direct flights from Shanghai and Wagga Wagga.

    The unveiling of the Big Tennis Racquet in nearby Barellan was a further humiliation for the townsfolk, who were often the subject of cruel taunts from their northern neighbours. Not surprisingly, they soon reached break point.

    The people of Narrandera were left with nothing but the shirts on their backs (which were, shockingly, emblazoned with the words ‘World’s Largest Playable Guitar’ and thus rendered unfashionable). The town never fully recovered from the tragedy, and when I visited a palpable atmosphere of depression and defeat engulfed Narrandera like a thick fog. I struggled to locate the huge ukelele, because locals burst into tears when I asked about it.

    Yesterday’s guitar hero

    After discovering the Guitar had been sequestered away to the Narrandera Visitor Information Centre, I trotted inside and was led out the back by a very pleasant volunteer. The Guitar didn’t string me along, and we shared a chord-ial greeting. He may be the second-biggest playable guitar, but, with his handsome plywood body and carefully-painted details, he’s number one in my heart!

    I plucked up the courage to play with him and, with the assistance of a rambunctious local granny, banged out a rousing rendition of Old Time Rock and Roll. As we segued seamlessly into The Crocodile Rock, local shopkeepers and students swept in through the front doors, surprised but delighted to hear the Guitar playing once again. Narranderans jived and gyrated as our playing became wilder, and the gloom that had consumed the town lifted.

    With sweat pouring down my face and the final echoes of my hour-long interpretation of Stairway to Heaven fading in the twilight, I felt a firm but friendly hand on my shoulder. Turning, I was met by an impish man in a broad, black hat – my good mate, roadside attraction-loving country music legend Lee Kernaghan. We embraced in front of the Big Playable Guitar as our admirers cheered us on.

    Lee, me, and the Guitar make three!

    “We need to stop cuddling in front of Big Guitars,” I beamed when we finally came up for air.

    “Bigs,” Lee Kernaghan rasped, with tears in his eyes. “Look at what you’ve done! You’ve brought life and love back to Narrandera. You’ve saved the bloody town, mate.”

    “Firstly, Lee Kernaghan, I don’t care for your colourful language,” I snapped. “You’re a talented songwriter who can surely find more appropriate ways to express yourself. And anyway, the Big Playable Guitar is the true hero of this story. I’m just a vagabond with a heart of gold, travelling the land to cast light upon the trials and tribulations of our beautiful Bigs.”

    “My apologies, Bigs. You’re right as always. Do you want some more of these Country Music Awards? I won another eight this year and they’re just piling up. I’ve been using them to tip waiters.”

    And so, with a song once more in the heart of every Narranderan, Lee Kernaghan and I climbed atop my scooter and burnt out in the endless night. With our smiles cutting through the darkness and only the stars to guide us, we chased our next Big adventure.